Why you shouldn't (ver.6)

get a dog the same color as your carpet...they get stepped on A LOT! It's great camo for him when he's doing something naughty though.

Why you shouldn't... (ver. 5)

let children under 5 take long early evening naps in your bed ---- sometimes they pee in them and you're up at 1:20 waiting on the linens in the dryer AND having to entertain an unsleepy? non-sleepy? awake child.

ahhh...the wonderful beeping of the dryer. A sound I usually dread because it means unmatched socks, clothes that need homes and things I should iron but usually just toss back into a pile that eventually gets thrown on the floor, covered in dog hair, washed again, tossed again...you get the picture.

Why you shouldn't... (ver. 4)

sit across from my husband if he's had more than 2 glasses of wine. Imagine a table filled with 16 of Ken's co-workers and their spouses. Everybody is enjoying their wine, imported specialty cheeses, candied nuts and fruit. Ken is laughing uproariously, throws his arms up and SPLOOSH...his entire glass of wine splashes across my chest and face like arterial blood in a bad horror movie. You should have heard all the women suck in their breath for an "ooooooohhhhh!"

Poor Ken felt horrible. Luckily, I was prepared with a lovely cardigan to throw over it. It's nothing a little Oxi couldn't handle!

Why you shouldn't (ver 3)

get two stupid dogs. We originally had just one stupid (not really, i only include him to make the REAL stupid dog feel better) Sparky. He is a super mutt dog. We saved him from the pound and he has been a faithful companion ever since. He's old and sick now so I fear the day is near. I thought it was yesterday in fact. After shopping I opened the door to the house and there was Stupid #2, Charlie Brown (chocolate lab), knocking me over to go out. Sparky, always the gentledog, usually waits for me to come in and give him a "good dog" before running out. He wasn't there. I searched and searched...my throat getting tight with the thought that I might find him "gone." Now, I'm usually not one to get worked up over pets but Spark really is a good dog who's been here everytime we've brought a baby home, has happily gone on all 8 house moves over the last 12 years and lets children "love" him. I did find him locked in my sewing room a tad panicked. Afraid the fabric would topple and smother him, I'm sure.

Back to why you shouldn't get two stupid dogs...this above. These pictures were taken within seconds today with me standing in the same spot. Good boy Sparky is waiting patiently at the front door to be let in...dumb dumb Charlie Brown is barking his head off at the wrong door. Many many MANY times a day we have to go through this. I call and call him to get him to come to the right door. He just stands there, "duh. I can see you. let dumb dumb in." Being a total dog training slacker and downright lazy butt I sigh disgustedly and finally let him in the "wrong door." Who's dumb now???

Why you shouldn't (ver.2) ...

crochet with your feet! Crafters warning! (if you are squeamish do NOT scroll down)

The ringing phone woke me this morning. My poor sis, Loral needed a lift to the hospital to remove a crochet hook that was stuck in her pinky toe (OUCH!) Of course the first thing I did was grab my camera. The pic is a bit blurry because we were laughing our butts off. I told her not to crochet with her feet while jumping on the trampoline but she wouldn't listen!

Why you shouldn't....

drink milk from our fridge!

I came across these photos of Jedi while cleaning some space from my laptop. He was about two and a half. I asked him after this milk chugging incident why he wouldn't ask for a glass, his reply, "wanna dwink like a man." Hmm...me thinks I must speak to my man about that!

Notice the dribble of milk!

He was considerate enough to put the cap back on the empty jug and return it to the fridge....just like a man! To this day he will ask to drink it like a man...even though I ALWAYS say no. More old photos to come. ;-)